Monday, November 29, 2010

Viz Top Tips

- DURING WINTER, put pop tarts on your radiators so you can have a warm snack throughout the day whilst saving electricity on your toaster.

- SAVE MONEY on electric toothbrushes by simply clamping a bottle brush into the chuck of a Black & Decker drill.

- DON'T BUY bright red paint for exterior metalwork from B&Q. Judging by the state of many of their DIY stores, it's really shit.

- BREAKFAST LOVERS. Make the 'toast always lands butter side down' myth wrong by dropping your toast, then quickly buttering it before someone sees.

- MAKE YOUR own inexpensive mints by leaving blobs of toothpaste to dry on a window sill. Use striped toothpaste to make humbugs.

- GAMBLERS. Convince fellow punters that you have some inside knowledge by simply cheering every race winner and then counting a wad of cash in your pocket.

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